The Calm Confidence Podcast: Social Anxiety and Being Yourself

Appeasing others is at the core of social anxiety. It is also short lived and never solves the deeper problem within. The very attempt to get appease and get approval reminds us we still need it, which makes us feel inferior to others. In this episode I explore how to give yourself permission to express yourself and take risks. We must learn and replace our overt and subtle attempts to get approval from others, and begin to express ourselves despite the possibility for rejection and ridicule.

Interested in going deeper into understanding social anxiety and how to start taking your life back? Check out my full 3 hour length social anxiety course here: https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-course

Want To Work With Me? Check out my services here: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence

Don’t you hate when people tell you to just be yourself? “Just express yourself and you’ll find your people,” is what they tell you. The problem is you don’t know who you are. This is a common problem for those of use who struggle with our confidence. On this episode I explore how our fear causes us to be dishonest with ourselves and others, which leads to this identity confusion.

Interested in going deeper into understanding social anxiety and how to start taking your life back? Check out my full 3 hour length social anxiety course here:
https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-course

Want To Work With Me? Check out my services here:
https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence

When my social anxiety was at it's worst, people would try to convince me that it was all in my head; that no one was thinking about me as much as I thought they were. And for a while I thought this would help. I tried to convince myself that no one was looking, staring or judging. But this never made me feel any better because I was always worried about the "what ifs." "But what if they are looking at me, then what do I do?" The reality is we cannot overcome a fear by convincing ourselves the thing we are afraid of is impossible, because it never is. When we are thinking like this, we are still thinking from a state of fear. We want to eventually get to a point where we accept that judgment is possible, but we can be ok with that.Other relevant episodes:
How To Actually Not Care What People Think: https://spotifycreators-web.app.link/e/pq9mOJLL35b
How To Actually Be Yourself: https://spotifycreators-web.app.link/e/dJu0THLL35bInterested in going deeper into understanding social anxiety and how to start taking your life back? Check out my full 3 hour length social anxiety course here:
https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-courseWant To Work With Me? Check out my services here: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence

In today’s episode we explore how our mind convinces us that avoidance is a good thing. When we are really anxious we start to truly believe that social interactions are inherently dangerous, weird or awkward. The truth is they just FEEL that way. We need to teach our brain that we can handle more than we think, and it’s time we stop justifying our fears.

Interested in working with me?
https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence

Social Anxiety Course (50% Off with the Code: August):

https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-course

Social Anxiety Mini Workbook (FREE):

https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/digital_downloads/minibook

"Just Be Yourself." The worst advice known to man for social anxiety. Despite knowing how unhelpful this is, we can often find ourselves trying to be more "ourself." However, this desire often leads to more obsessiveness, rumination and perfectionism. It is performance rather than being. Instead we need to lower our standards. We need to understand what we can and cannot do at this given time with our anxiety, and give ourselves flexible expectations so we can see progress. Your "true" self may emerge once you stop fixating on it, or maybe it won't. But maybe it doesn't matter.
Other relevant episodes:
How To Actually Be Yourself: https://open.spotify.com/episode/7qxdc1vSia5PXnvrnlTasQ?si=2ADoYuFOQXWlCq3--jBzwA
How To Like Yourself: https://open.spotify.com/episode/67AfJBOLvae9n6hENlbiDx?si=GWeNKg5oSuKbcVZwlpR1MQ
Are You Faking It? https://open.spotify.com/episode/6QgK3oPAOXg8RFWvggrUxB?si=qE-Yv5wxToSYygftIJTfKg
Interested in going deeper into understanding social anxiety and how to start taking your life back? Check out my full 3 hour length social anxiety course here: https://calm-confidence-5785.thinkific.com/products/courses/social-anxiety-courseWant To Work With Me? Check out my services here: https://linktr.ee/calmconfidence