The Stepmom Diaries | Blended Family & Stepmom Support Podcast

BONUS REWIND: Is Your Therapist Making Your Stepfamily Problems Worse? (Ep. 135)
What if the advice you're getting in therapy is actually making your stepfamily problems worse?
You've tried therapy. You've followed the advice. You've been told to be more patient, create more family togetherness, or take a bigger role in disciplining your stepchildren. And somehow, things have gotten even harder.
But what if the problem isn't you? What if your therapist is working from the wrong family map?
In this special Bonus Rewind of The Stepmom Diaries, Cameron revisits one of the most important conversations for stepmoms who have tried everything and still feel stuck.
The reality is that stepfamilies operate differently from first families, yet many therapists receive little formal training in stepfamily dynamics. Even well-meaning professionals can unintentionally offer advice that creates more frustration than progress.
Cameron breaks down what the research actually tells us about stepfamily development, why traditional therapy approaches sometimes miss the mark, and how to recognize whether your therapist truly understands blended families.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why traditional family therapy advice can make stepfamily challenges worse

How stepfamily relationships develop differently from first-family relationships

Four questions to ask a therapist about their stepfamily training and approach

What a healthy, realistic stepparent and stepchild relationship can look like

This isn't about criticizing therapy or telling you to leave a therapist you trust. It's about making sure your family gets support that actually fits.
Because sometimes you're not doing anything wrong. You've just been handed the wrong map.
Originally released August 6, 2026, as Episode 135 of The Stepmom Diaries.
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Resources Mentioned
Learn more about Patricia Papernow and her clinical work on stepfamily development
Explore research by Todd Jensen on stepfamilies and the gap between research and professional practice 
Look for Patricia Papernow's clinical book on working with stepfamilies

Ever feel relieved when your stepkids go back to their other home, then immediately feel guilty about it? You're not alone. And it doesn't make you a bad stepmom.
In this episode of The Stepmom Diaries, Cameron Normand talks with Alyssa Kirk, founder of Stepmom Social Club, about stepmom guilt, impossible expectations, high-conflict co-parenting, and why taking care of yourself isn't selfish. From the pressure to treat your stepkids like your own to the judgment that follows when you do, Alyssa and Cameron get honest about the realities of blended family life.
In this episode, we talk about:
• Why it is okay to need a break when your stepkids leave.
• The double standards and unsolicited advice that can fuel stepmom guilt.
• Grounding yourself before reacting to high-conflict co-parenting situations.
• Why connecting with other stepmoms can make the role less lonely.
They also talk about the evil stepmother stereotype, dealing with online criticism, and finding friends who understand the realities of your family. You don't have to love every minute of stepmom life to care deeply about your family.
 
Resources Shared in This Episode:
Find Alyssa: Stepmom Social Club on Instagram and Patreon.

Want to find your people? Join us inside Stepfamily Circle, the supportive community for stepmoms navigating blended family life: https://stepfamilycircle.com/

 
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"I don't like being a stepmom today."
Have you ever thought that and immediately felt guilty about it? Maybe you're dreading another custody weekend, feeling resentful about everything you're expected to do, or just wishing you could take a little break from stepmom life.
I've been there. And here's something I want you to hear: You can love your stepfamily without loving every minute of being a stepmom.
In this episode, we're talking about those complicated feelings so many stepmoms experience but are afraid to admit out loud. More importantly, we're looking at what those feelings might actually be trying to tell you.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why feeling frustrated or resentful doesn't make you a bad stepmom

How stepmom guilt can make an already difficult situation feel even worse

Three questions to help you understand what's really behind your resentment

Why changing your boundaries and responsibilities may be more helpful than changing your attitude

You don't have to love being a stepmom every minute to be a loving stepmom.
Resources Mentioned:
Episode 125: A deeper look at what's actually within your control as a stepmom

Looking for a community of women who really get what it's like to be a stepmom? Come join us inside the Stepfamily Circle: https://stepfamilycircle.com/

If this episode made you feel a little less alone, share it with another stepmom who might need to hear it.
Love The Stepmom Diaries?
Please consider rating and reviewing The Stepmom Diaries on Spotify or Apple Podcasts. Your feedback helps the show grow and reach more blended families who need honest conversations like this one.

Can you love your stepkids and still grieve the child you may never have? It's one of those complicated feelings that can be incredibly hard to admit, even to yourself.
Infertility as a stepmom brings a unique kind of grief. You're already part of a family, helping raise children, and watching your partner experience parenthood while wondering if you'll ever have a child of your own. And the guilt, resentment, and heartbreak that can come with those feelings? They're not always easy to talk about.
In this episode, Cameron sits down with Jen Powell, founder of The Sober Stepmom, a coach who supports childless stepmothers navigating identity, belonging, grief, and the emotional complexities of stepfamily life.
Together, they open up about their personal experiences with IVF, including Cameron's five unsuccessful rounds of treatment and Jen's heartbreaking decision to cancel an embryo transfer.
But this conversation goes beyond infertility. They explore what happens when the family you're already part of makes it harder to pursue the family you imagined, and why those feelings can bring an entirely different layer of guilt and grief.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why infertility as a stepmom can feel especially isolating when you're already helping raise someone else's children.

The complicated emotions childless stepmoms often struggle to admit, including guilt, resentment, and grief.

What led Jen to cancel her embryo transfer and why that decision was both heartbreaking and necessary.

Why putting yourself first during infertility doesn't make you a bad stepmom, even when other people don't understand your decisions.

Loving your stepfamily and grieving the child you hoped to have can both be true, and you deserve the space to feel both.
Resources Mentioned in This Episode
Connect with Jen Powell, founder of The Sober Stepmom:

Instagram: @the_sober_stepmom

Facebook: The Sober Stepmom

Grab our FREE "10 Essential Scripts for Stepmoms": https://stepfamilycertification.com/stepmom-scripts

Love The Stepmom Diaries?
Please consider rating and reviewing The Stepmom Diaries on Spotify or Apple Podcasts. Your feedback helps the show grow and reach more blended families who need honest conversations like this one.

Should a stepmom discipline stepkids? It's one of those questions that sounds simple until you're the one living it.
A lot of stepmoms come in wanting to help, be supportive, and feel like a real part of the family. But when you're expected to parent without the same history, authority, or connection, things can go sideways fast.
In this episode, Cameron sits down with April Eldemire, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist, couples therapist, blended family expert, and former stepmom with more than 13 years of experience working with couples.
Together, they dig into the big question: Should a stepmom discipline her stepkids, and if so, when?
April breaks down what stepmoms often take on too soon, what the biological parent should be handling instead, and why trying to "parent like a mom" before the relationship is there can backfire.
They also get into the bigger issue underneath all of this: What is actually your job as a stepmom? Because the answer may look very different than you think, and it may even look different with each stepchild.
In this episode, you'll learn:
When should a stepmom discipline stepkids

Why connection before correction matters so much when building trust with your stepkids.

How unclear roles can leave stepmoms feeling like the bad guy, and what the biological parent can do to better support their partner. april-cameron

The simple 15-minute weekly trick that can completely change how you and your partner handle stepfamily stress, parenting, and decisions.

 
If you have ever wondered whether you are too involved, not involved enough, or taking on responsibilities that should belong to your partner, this conversation will help you think differently about your role.
Being a good stepmom does not mean doing all the parenting. Sometimes the healthiest thing you can do for your relationship with your stepkids, your partner, and yourself is to get very clear about what is actually yours to carry.
 
Resources Mentioned in This Episode
Connect with April Eldemire, LMFT:
Website: Couples-thrive.com
Instagram, YouTube, Facebook and TikTok: @couplesthrive
Grab our FREE "10 Essential Scripts for Stepmoms": https://stepfamilycertification.com/stepmom-scripts
April's Blended Family Quick Win Toolkit gives couples practical tools to reduce "my kid/your kid" conflict and start parenting more like a team in just 7 days.
 
Love The Stepmom Diaries?
Please consider rating and reviewing The Stepmom Diaries on Spotify or Apple Podcasts. Your feedback helps the show grow and reach more blended families who need honest conversations like this one.