Parenting on Purpose: Moving Beyond Parenting Differences
Got a question, comment, or just want to drop some encouragement? Send us a text.What happens when two loving parents disagree about how to respond to their child's behavior? This deeply personal episode dives into one of the most challenging conflicts couples face—differing parenting approaches.Through the story of Justin and Lori, we examine how bedtime struggles with their six-year-old son leads to couple conflict. Justin believes in firm boundaries and worries about being manipulated, while Lori focuses on understanding what's driving their son's behavior. This scenario leaves both parents feeling misunderstood and judged by their partner.Stephen Mitchell, PhD and Erin Mitchell, MACP unpack the neuroscience of effective parenting—acknowledging a child's experience, attuning to their emotional state, and reflecting/mirroring what we observe—while honestly addressing why this approach can be difficult to implement consistently in real life. Most importantly, they explore how our own childhood experiences create emotional triggers that make these conversations particularly charged. Stephen shares how his resistance stems from not wanting to parent like his father, while Erin reflects on how being raised by a busy single mother shaped her approach to structure and boundaries.The path forward isn't about determining who's right, but understanding what drives our reactions and learning to "parent on purpose" instead of from automatic patterns. By approaching these differences with kindness and curiosity, couples can move from rigid opposition to thoughtful collaboration.Want more resources to help transform your essential relationship conflicts into deeper connection? Our book "Too Tired to Fight" gives you practical tools to navigate the 13 conflicts every couple faces, including parenting differences. Available wherever books are sold: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/059371427X
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39:21
Could I Get a Little Validation Over Here?
Got a question, comment, or just want to drop some encouragement? Send us a text.Life as a parent can often feel like a flood of responsibilities, expectations, and emotional exhaustion. In this episode, Stephen Mitchell, PhD and Erin Mitchell, MACP, address the cycle of invalidation that can arise between partners as they try to juggle tasks and manage parenting stress. Through the story of Raj and Brynn, we explore how feelings of being overworked and underappreciated can lead to mutual invalidation in relationships. Join us in uncovering the steps necessary to shift out of a cycle of invalidation into a pattern of offering vulnerability and validation. Tune in for meaningful insights and real world scripts that can help you strengthen your couple relationship as you parent.
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26:49
I Handle Stress "Right," It's My Partner That Handles Stress "Wrong"
Got a question, comment, or just want to drop some encouragement? Send us a text.This episode dives into the dynamics of emotional regulation between partners in stressful parenting moments, highlighting the contrasting coping behaviors of downshifting and upshifting. Stephen Mitchell, PhD and Erin Mitchell, MACP provide practical insights using a relatable case study, illustrating how couples can navigate these tensions and foster meaningful communication to create a supportive family environment.• Explaining the downshift-upshift coping dynamic in relationships • Analyzing a common conflict scenario in parenting • Discussing the role of everyday stressors on couple dynamics • Introducing the concept of co-regulation between partners • Offering actionable strategies for improving communication during stress
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26:02
From Silent Resentment to Connection
Got a question, comment, or just want to drop some encouragement? Send us a text.In this episode, we explore the pervasive issue of resentment in couple relationships, particularly among parents. We discuss its roots in unexpressed emotions and decision-making conflicts, emphasizing the importance of vulnerability, active listening, and mutual understanding to resolve underlying issues and prevent resentment from taking hold. Here is what we cover in the show: • Resentment often arises from feelings of being undervalued or unheard • Parenting pressures can exacerbate feelings of resentment • Major life decisions often become breeding grounds for resentment • Vulnerability and transparency are essential for healthy conversations • Mutual understanding plays a key role in decision-making dynamics • Listening without defensiveness fosters connection and heals rifts • Conflict can be an opportunity for growth and intimacy • Practical insights for managing resentment in relationships offered
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37:39
Good Sex-An Interview with Author Dr. Candice Nicole Hargons
Got a question, comment, or just want to drop some encouragement? Send us a text.Ever wonder how parenting impacts your intimate relationship? Join us for a compelling conversation with renowned sex expert Dr. Candice Nicole Hargons as she shares insights from her latest book, "Good Sex." She dives into the challenges of maintaining a healthy sexual relationship amidst the responsibilities of parenthood. Dr. Hargons, an associate professor at Emory University, offers a compassionate perspective on navigating the changing dynamics of intimacy. She emphasizes the importance of communication and renegotiating relationship terms as couples journey through different stages of parenting.
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