How Not to Screw Up Your Kids

In this episode, I will walk you through the real first week of the school holidays - the meltdowns, the boredom, the clinginess, the explosions over nothing - and why this week is always the hardest for anxious children.

I explain exactly what’s happening in your child’s nervous system when the school‑day scaffolding disappears, why their bucket fills before lunchtime, and the three practical tools you can use immediately to stabilise the week.

So if you’re standing in your kitchen wondering how you’re going to survive six weeks, this episode gives you what you need to get through the first seven days without losing yourself!

Highlights from this episode:
01:11 - When the scaffolding comes down
03:00 - What is the bucket?
05:09 - Name the state, not the behaviour
08:50 - Predictable moments
11:01 - Lower your expectations
14:33 - Holiday rhythm card

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together

💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/

💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library

💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025

💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

☀️ NEW — The Summer Reset. My seven-week summer programme for parents of anxious children (5–16) — whatever sets the worry off: five live group coaching calls + two private 1:1 sessions with me + every tool, all summer. 18 families only, starts 23 July. Details & enrolment: https://stan.store/drmaryhan/p/the-summer-reset

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Summer holidays are tough for parents, but it can be a hidden superpower! In this episode, I explain exactly why anxious children struggle the moment school ends, why the holidays bring out their anxiety, and the five practical tools that genuinely help.

I walk you through the real reason behind the meltdowns, the boredom‑to‑explosion cycle, the clinginess, and the screen‑time battles. You’ll learn how predictability, scaffolding, social structure and nervous‑system load change dramatically once term ends - and why this shift hits anxious children harder than anyone expects.

I also break down the three groups of children who improve in the holidays:
separation‑anxious children
school‑specific anxious children, and
children who monitor family safety.

By the end of this episode, you’ll have a clear, compassionate framework for understanding your child’s behaviour, plus five actionable tools you can start right now.

Highlights from this episode:
01:22 - Anxiety is information
04:45 - How to spot anxiety
09:23 - Social comparison
12:19 - The trigger has left the building
16:54 - Contrast is the signal
20:57 - Where does overwhelm come from?
23:18 - 5 tools to use now

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together

💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/

💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library

💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025

💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

☀️ NEW — The Summer Reset. My seven-week summer programme for parents of anxious children (5–16) — whatever sets the worry off: five live group coaching calls + two private 1:1 sessions with me + every tool, all summer. 18 families only, starts 23 July. Details & enrolment: https://stan.store/drmaryhan/p/the-summer-reset

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In today’s bucket‑emptying episode, I’m giving you the exact words to use in one of the hardest parenting moments: when your child looks at you and says “I’m not good enough.”

If you’ve ever watched your child crumble after a mistake, a test, a football practice, or a moment that didn’t go their way, and your reassurance only made things worse, you need this episode.

I walk you through three specific tools that work with an overwhelmed nervous system, not against it.

You’ll learn why reassurance backfires, what’s actually happening inside your child’s emotional bucket, and how to respond in a way that builds resilience, emotional regulation, and self‑worth.

If your child struggles with perfectionism, anxiety, low confidence, big feelings, or shutdowns, this episode is your secret weapon.

Highlights from this episode:
02:12 - This is what your child really means
04:31 - Do this before anything else
07:16 - Permanence is terrifying
09:24 - Empty the bucket
11:48 - My give to you

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together

💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/

💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library

💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025

💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

☀️ NEW — The Summer Reset. My seven-week summer programme for parents of anxious children (5–16) — whatever sets the worry off: five live group coaching calls + two private 1:1 sessions with me + every tool, all summer. 18 families only, starts 23 July. Details & enrolment: https://stan.store/drmaryhan/p/the-summer-reset

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If you’re a woman in your 40s or 50s who feels like everything has suddenly become harder - the brain fog, the overwhelm, the burnout, the emotional crashes, the sense that you’re “failing” at things you used to manage - this episode may explain more than you realise.

I’m joined again by Jessie Hewitson to talk about a phenomenon we’re seeing everywhere: women in peri‑ and post‑menopause receiving an ADHD or autism diagnosis for the very first time.

Jessie shares her own story, how supporting her neurodivergent son led her to recognise lifelong patterns in herself, and how the hormonal shifts of perimenopause made previously manageable struggles suddenly impossible to ignore. We talk about why so many women were missed as children, how inattentive ADHD presents completely differently in girls and women, why masking works until it doesn’t, and how executive function collapses under hormonal change.

We also dive into rejection sensitivity dysphoria, people‑pleasing, burnout, the “good girl” conditioning so many women carry, and why the perfect storm of midlife - teenagers, aging parents, senior roles, and hormonal upheaval - pushes long‑standing neurodivergence to the surface.

If you’ve ever wondered why you’re suddenly overwhelmed by tasks you used to juggle, why anxiety has spiked, why your coping strategies have stopped working, or why menopause feels like more than menopause, this conversation will give you clarity, and help you understand what might really be going on.

Highlights from this episode:
01:44 - Neurotypical strategies don’t work!
04:43 - Inattentive versus hyperactive
10:25 - Executive function
16:43 - ADHD and burnout
19:25 - Rejection sensitivity
25:17 - Anxiety of falling short
28:59 - The shame of ADHD
32:51 - Task initiation

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together

💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/

💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library

💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025

💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If your daughter is “fine at school” but falling apart at home - the meltdowns, the morning battles, the homework explosions, the constant need for you to narrate every step - this episode may be the missing piece you’ve been searching for. Because none of this is about attitude, defiance or bad parenting. It may be ADHD, and in girls it looks nothing like the stereotype.

In this episode, I walk you through three signs of ADHD in girls that are missed for years sometimes decades. You’ll learn why your daughter’s bucket fills faster than anyone realises, why she can hold it together all day only to unravel the moment she feels safe, why she can’t sequence tasks her peers manage easily, and why her emotional reactions seem so out of proportion to the trigger.

I’ll show you how masking works, why teachers often see a completely different child, and why girls are diagnosed three to four years later than boys… if they’re diagnosed at all.

And most importantly, I’ll give you the language and the framework to recognise these signs in your daughter and know exactly what to do next.

If you’ve been quietly wondering whether something deeper is going on, if anxiety treatment hasn’t shifted the core problem, if the worry keeps coming back, if the restlessness never quite makes sense, this episode will help you see your daughter clearly, compassionately, and accurately.

You know your child. If something has felt “off” for a long time, trust that. And let this episode be your starting point.

Highlights from this episode:
02:14 - The stuff nobody else sees
04:48 - This is why your daughter is not diagnosed
07:11 - Executive dysfunction
10:07 - It’s not bad behaviour
12:09 - Why do girls get missed?
14:20 - Treatment is more than medication

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together

💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/

💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library

💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025

💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.