Emotionally Uncomfortable

"It's okay to push an edge once in a while, but it's also really okay to say, 'I need to stop doing this.'"
In this episode, Heather explores the difference between resistance, fear, and shame, and simply not having the capacity to do what you're asking of yourself. It can be humbling when your brain is ready to move forward, but your body and emotions haven't caught up yet, and this conversation gets into why we hit the wall when we start changing how we operate, how overextending ourselves breeds resentment, and why recovery is essential to building the capacity we want. Heather also unpacks the importance of taking smaller steps toward the things we're avoiding, without pushing ourselves into a state we can't sustain that results in resentment. If you've been struggling to move forward and can't tell whether you need to push through or give yourself room to recover, this episode is for you.
 
What to listen for:
☑️ The magic of the middle bridge when mastering resistance
☑️ Different ways women "hit the wall" when we start moving differently
☑️ How to distinguish between resistance and a lack of emotional capacity
 
"You don't have the mental and emotional capacity, and that's why you can't do it, not because you have an invisible mental load. This isn't a fear issue or a resistance issue."
☑️ Why limited capacity is similar to having less cash than you need
☑️ The reason we end up angry and resentful when we overextend ourselves
☑️ Emotional capacity is required to identify what you're feeling in the first place
 
"There are moments where I just need to push through and get something done, and that might be a little bit of effort. But there are legit moments where that is dangerous."
☑️ The humbling experience of your brain wanting to be further along than you are
☑️ Knowing your patterns and how you tend to overextend your capacity
☑️ Discerning what you do and do not have emotional capacity for
 
"Just because something looks good on paper doesn't mean when you put that puzzle piece in the bigger picture, it fits."
☑️ If you don't take enough time to recover, you can't build capacity
☑️ Do more of what you're avoiding in small steps that move you forward
☑️ You don't need to charge ahead; you just need to lean into the discomfort
 
***
For those of you who are ready to stop feeling drained, overextended, and out of alignment… join me inside the Energetic Time Management Accelerator, a focused experience designed to help high-achieving women uncover what's draining them, clarify what truly matters, and create a simple plan that fits their life.
We'll pinpoint your biggest time + energy leaks, identify the top areas to focus on for quick momentum, and map out exactly what to let go of so you can reclaim your energy, your time, and your joy.
Ready to make your time work for you without adding more to your plate?
Join the Energetic Time Management Accelerator:
www.heatherchauvin.com/time
Explore the top episodes listeners come back to when they're stuck, burned out, or standing at the edge of a big shift: www.heatherchauvin.com/10
Follow Heather on Instagram: www.instagram.com/heatherchauvin_

"You have to love yourself so much that you love yourself more than the need to be loved by other people."
In this episode, Heather and Sabrina Zohar explore what it takes to stop abandoning yourself in the pursuit of being loved, chosen, and understood by other people. They get into the difference between boundaries and walls, why a lack of self-trust can keep you repeating the same relationship patterns, and how the chaos you learned to associate with love as a child can determine who you're attracted to as an adult. Having great relationships means learning to love yourself, and learning to love yourself means being willing to let go of the story you've been telling about who you are and what you need to do to be worthy of others' love. If you're ready to build healthier relationships without self-abandonment, this episode is for you.
 
What to listen for:
☑️ Taking accountability for what we continue allowing through our lack of boundaries
☑️ Feeling seen and heard and why you need to take radical accountability
☑️ Why a lack of self-trust will never yield the results you're seeking
 
"Boundaries are a beautiful example of, 'this is what I need and here's how I'm going to show up. If that works for you, great. And if not, that's okay.'  Walls are, 'I don't trust myself, so I have to put all of these things in front of me because I don't know how to take care of myself.'"
☑️ The difference between having boundaries and walls in relationships
☑️ Getting out of reactionary states so you can make conscious decisions
☑️ Expanding your capacity for dating when you haven't done so in a while
 
"The gap there is you trusting yourself enough to say, 'I can grieve and have compassion for myself if it doesn't work out, but I'm also ready to receive, and I know that I am worthy and deserving.'"
☑️ Learning to be attracted to healthy partnerships over unhealthy ones
☑️ Chaos often feels like love because a chaotic childhood is where we learn it
☑️ What did you used to accept that you're no longer willing to?
 
"You have to date yourself to really understand what you're going to want in a partner. Otherwise, you're constantly abandoning yourself, hoping you're chosen, but you're not actually connecting."
☑️ When to lean in and give someone time, and how to know it's not aligned
☑️ Expanding your capacity for disappointment and feeling okay within yourself
☑️ Questions you can ask to get to the root of your core wounds and beliefs
 
About Sabrina Zohar:
Sabrina Zohar is a dynamic entrepreneur and dating coach renowned for her transformative podcast, The Sabrina Zohar Show. With a clear, no-nonsense approach to relationship advice, Sabrina's podcast has resonated globally, ranking in the top 0.05% of all podcasts. Each episode features practical tips backed by board-certified and licensed psychologists, aimed at helping listeners improve their dating lives by fostering self-worth and personal growth. 
Connect with Sabrina:
https://sabrinazohar.com/book 
***
For those of you who are ready to stop feeling drained, overextended, and out of alignment… join me inside the Energetic Time Management Accelerator, a focused experience designed to help high-achieving women uncover what's draining them, clarify what truly matters, and create a simple plan that fits their life.
We'll pinpoint your biggest time + energy leaks, identify the top areas to focus on for quick momentum, and map out exactly what to let go of so you can reclaim your energy, your time, and your joy.
Ready to make your time work for you without adding more to your plate?
Join the Energetic Time Management Accelerator:
www.heatherchauvin.com/time
Explore the top episodes listeners come back to when they're stuck, burned out, or standing at the edge of a big shift: www.heatherchauvin.com/10
Follow Heather on Instagram: www.instagram.com/heatherchauvin_

"What you did up until this point in your life doesn't always mean that it's going to be the thing that gets you to the next point."
In this episode, Heather explores what happens when the strategies, habits, and ways of operating that got you to where you are today are no longer what will get you where you're going next. As your life, business, and capacity change, so do the ways you need to spend your time, energy, and attention. She gets into the four types of profit, what your resentment can reveal about what you're carrying that isn't yours, and what it looks like to raise your standards while lowering your tolerance for what drains you using real examples from her own life. The conversation also explores how changing your own response can shift the dynamics around you, why the things you need to do are often the ones you resist most, and how emotional neutrality is built through repetition. If you're entering a new chapter of your life and know that the way you've been operating can't come with you, this episode is for you.
 
What to listen for:
☑️ Where you're investing your time and energy dictates the results you get
☑️ The four types of profit and where they show up in our lives and businesses
☑️ Advanced energy strategies that will support the next decade of your life
 
"If I feel like someone is rude, disrespectful, or mean and they don't have the discernment to be able to hold their emotional discomfort and use their words to communicate, I just let them go."
☑️ Raising your standards and lowering your tolerance for what drains you
☑️ No longer managing the invisible load and responsibilities that aren't yours
☑️ Facing your resentment and allowing it to guide your next steps forward
 
"What I've been reminded of is the energy output of not taking on somebody else's invisible load is a lot at the beginning. It's a lot of energy to constantly take something off your plate that you know should not be there."
☑️ Changing someone else's behavior by changing your reaction to it
☑️ The things you need to be doing are the things you have resistance around
☑️ You can't have more of something if you're not willing to look at it first
 
"At the end of the day, it's about emotional neutrality. And the only way to get to emotional neutrality where you have no trigger reaction is repetition."
☑️ Trusting your physical body and listening to what it's communicating
☑️ Showing up for our goals with the capacity we have and not overextending
☑️ Pinpointing what it is that you're no longer willing to carry or tolerate
 
***
For those of you who are ready to stop feeling drained, overextended, and out of alignment… join me inside the Energetic Time Management Accelerator, a focused experience designed to help high-achieving women uncover what's draining them, clarify what truly matters, and create a simple plan that fits their life.
We'll pinpoint your biggest time + energy leaks, identify the top areas to focus on for quick momentum, and map out exactly what to let go of so you can reclaim your energy, your time, and your joy.
Ready to make your time work for you without adding more to your plate?
Join the Energetic Time Management Accelerator:
www.heatherchauvin.com/time
Explore the top episodes listeners come back to when they're stuck, burned out, or standing at the edge of a big shift: www.heatherchauvin.com/10
Follow Heather on Instagram: www.instagram.com/heatherchauvin_

"The work is work, and the rattling of your cage comes with side effects, and you have to know that in advance before entering."
In this episode, Heather and Coach Keren Eldad talk about what happens after the breakthrough: pushing against the edges of an old identity, recognizing the behaviors that accompany restlessness, and learning to move through resistance without taking it as a sign to stop. They explore what it means to reach "cruising altitude," where momentum starts carrying you forward, and you finally stop negotiating with the life you actually want. We also get into the difference between coaching and therapy, and why you don't have to wait for another shit storm to decide something needs to change. Ultimately, this conversation shows that the real work begins when insight becomes integration, and you practice thinking differently and repeatedly putting your money where your mouth is.
What to listen for:
☑️ Most people need to do more work because insight is not integration
☑️ The best thing about hitting rock bottom is it forces you to face what happened
☑️ Specific behaviors always accompany restlessness, aimlessness, and loneliness
 
"When you lose everything and end up at rock bottom, the best thing is there's nowhere to go. You have to start understanding: there's a level of thinking I've been engaged in that isn't serving me."
☑️ Don't wait for the shit storm to make change when you can start right now
☑️ The edge of identity and the importance of getting outside your comfort zone
☑️ You're going to have to put your money where your mouth is again and again
 
"You don't jump out of the plane, launch the business, and all your problems are solved forever.  Now you have to learn how to live this way, how to truly practice this level of thinking."
☑️ Your mindset has to dominate everything, but that doesn't mean forcing things
☑️ What it looks like to reach "cruising altitude," which is all about momentum
☑️ Reaching a state where you're simply not negotiating with life anymore
 
"I really need to put my money where my mouth is means I accept nothing less than ease. I accept nothing less than my preferences. I will only work in my zone of genius."
☑️ Why changing identities causes pushback from the people around us
☑️ The difference between coaching and therapy, and when to consider each
☑️ Resistance comes up when we take action, but that doesn't mean stop
 
***
About Keren Eldad:
Keren Eldad is an executive coach, speaker, and bestselling author of GILT FREE: Ditching Your Gilded Cage for Good. A former Fortune 500 executive, she has coached thousands of high achievers—from founders and Fortune 500 leaders to celebrities and professional athletes—to break free from burnout, perfectionism, and self-sabotage so they can build lives of extraordinary success and genuine fulfillment. Her podcast, Coached, ranks in the top 5% globally, her TEDx Talks have been viewed by half a million people worldwide, and her coaching work has been featured by The Harvard Business Review, Forbes, Goop, Fast Company, and Business Insider.
Connect with Keren:
www.kereneldad.com 

www.instagram.com/coachkeren

***
For those of you who are ready to stop feeling drained, overextended, and out of alignment… join me inside the Energetic Time Management Accelerator, a focused experience designed to help high-achieving women uncover what's draining them, clarify what truly matters, and create a simple plan that fits their life.
We'll pinpoint your biggest time + energy leaks, identify the top areas to focus on for quick momentum, and map out exactly what to let go of so you can reclaim your energy, your time, and your joy.
Ready to make your time work for you without adding more to your plate?
Join the Energetic Time Management Accelerator:
www.heatherchauvin.com/time
Explore the top episodes listeners come back to when they're stuck, burned out, or standing at the edge of a big shift: www.heatherchauvin.com/10
Follow Heather on Instagram: www.instagram.com/heatherchauvin_

"The best way you can help teach your kids is by modeling your own life, especially when it comes to money and investing."
In this episode, Heather and Josh Smith get into the uncomfortable reality of what happens when you continue to outsource the financial part of your life, assuming someone else will handle it or believing you're simply "not a money person." They talk about the shame and scarcity that keep people from learning, why investing has been made far more complicated than it needs to be, and how small, consistent decisions can fundamentally change your financial future through the power of compound growth. They also explore what it means to become genuinely resourced, how financial literacy creates more choice and freedom, why knowing enough to ask better questions matters even when you work with a financial professional, and what we teach the next generation when we model these skills ourselves. Because becoming financially empowered requires being willing to learn some of the uncomfortable things you were never taught.
 
What to listen for:
☑️ Building an investing system and getting money working harder for you
☑️ How health problems motivated Josh to start financially investing in himself 
☑️ Stop staying stuck in indecision and outsourcing your money management
 
"Maybe you won't have a yacht or a multimillion-dollar mansion, but at the very least, you can have a less stressful life. Which to me, that's more than worth any of the time you have to put into learning this stuff."
☑️ It's never too late to start securing a less financially stressful future for yourself
☑️ With investing, it's usually more worthwhile to take the "simple" approach
☑️ Financial planners have their role, but your understanding is crucial
 
"When you understand investing, it's easier to be more aggressive when it comes to investing and hitting your financial goals a lot sooner."
☑️ Adulting isn't always fun, but you still need to take radical responsibility
☑️ The compound effect of time investment and how far it can take you
☑️ You just have to move through the resistance and get started


About Josh Smith:
I didn't grow up talking about money. No one in my family explained compound interest, index funds, or why investing matters.  When I finally tried to get help thinking a financial advisor could guide me, they basically told me to come back when I'm rich.
That was the moment I decided to figure it out myself. I spent 12+ years learning how business and money really work. I graduated with magna cum laude from W.P. Carey School of Business. Worked at JP Morgan Chase. And I've read over 100 personal finance and investing books. 
I now share everything I've learned through The Market Hustle.  I've helped over 3,000 students build financial systems through Money Mastery and grew The Market Hustle community to over 1 million across social media.
My Free Compound Interest Guide: https://www.themarkethustle.com/compound
Connect with Josh:
www.themarkethustle.com

www.youtube.com/@themarkethustle3090

www.facebook.com/themarkethustle

www.instagram.com/themarkethustle

www.threads.com/@themarkethustle

x.com/themarkethustle

open.spotify.com/show/7n9NB9caG9ioYUZ47nx9cE?si=265dea8ffd9c48fa

***
For those of you who are ready to stop feeling drained, overextended, and out of alignment… join me inside the Energetic Time Management Accelerator, a focused experience designed to help high-achieving women uncover what's draining them, clarify what truly matters, and create a simple plan that fits their life.
We'll pinpoint your biggest time + energy leaks, identify the top areas to focus on for quick momentum, and map out exactly what to let go of so you can reclaim your energy, your time, and your joy.
Ready to make your time work for you without adding more to your plate?
Join the Energetic Time Management Accelerator:
www.heatherchauvin.com/time
Explore the top episodes listeners come back to when they're stuck, burned out, or standing at the edge of a big shift: www.heatherchauvin.com/10
Follow Heather on Instagram: www.instagram.com/heatherchauvin_