PodcastsEducaciónEmotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery

Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery

Allen Berger & Thom Rutledge
Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery
Último episodio

232 episodios

  • Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery

    Out of the Hurt Locker

    29/06/2026 | 33 min
    Thom’s Nutshell:

    We all have opinions. We all prefer certain outcomes. But attaching expectations to them is a choice. Disappointed? Upset? Devastated? Check your expectations.

    Why do we avoid going towards our pain? Because we don’t have faith in our ability to cope with it. In emotional sobriety we work on our self-esteem, which is part of that perpetual engine moving us towards wholeness.

    From James Redford. The Struggle:

    “If it were any easier, it would be meaningless.

    If it were any harder, it would be impossible.”

    More from James Redford: https://www.amazon.com/stores/James-Redford/author/B0B6QG81CK?ref=ap_rdr&shoppingPortalEnabled=true&ccs_id=fc6b511e-c7e0-4483-9773-b2a68db7ade9

    Our music is provided by the great southern artist Jefferson Ross. Learn more about Jefferson at jeffersonross.com

    Visit our website:

    www.emotionalsobriety.info

    Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here:

    https://rebelliondogspublishing.com 

    Follow us on social media:

    Instagram: thomrutledge2

    Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs

     

    Friendly Circle Berlin workshops: https://friendlycircleberlin.org/events

     

    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/

     

    Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below): 

    https://zoom.us/j/330149513

    Password: 375986

     

    For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here:

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g

     

    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link:

    https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519

    We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.

     

    We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

    Chapters

    (00:00:07) - Emotional Sobriety: The Hurt Locker
    (00:07:45) - In the Elevator With Real People
    (00:09:15) - It Doesn't Even Matter If It's Good
    (00:11:44) - Living With an Addiction: Step 12
    (00:16:18) - Alan on Emotional Sobriety
    (00:20:57) - Emotional Sobriety and Relationships
    (00:25:18) - Part 8: Cooperation and Integrity
    (00:27:40) - I Want to Be Seen
    (00:32:01) - Poem for the Soul: James Redfern
  • Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery

    Let It Be (With Joe C.)

    23/06/2026 | 24 min
    Thom’s Nutshell:

    Rather than praying for circumstances to change, pray for the strength and wisdom to face those circumstances.

    “This shouldn’t be happening!”

    Well, it IS happening. So how do we deal with it?

    Riffing on Rumi, Paul McCartney, and Kathryn Grody with superfriend Joe Chisholm.

    Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here:

    https://rebelliondogspublishing.com 

    Our music is provided by the great southern artist Jefferson Ross. Learn more about Jefferson at jeffersonross.com

    Visit our website:

    www.emotionalsobriety.info

    Follow us on social media:

    Instagram: thomrutledge2

    Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs

     

    Friendly Circle Berlin workshops: https://friendlycircleberlin.org/events

     

    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/

     

    Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below): 

    https://zoom.us/j/330149513

    Password: 375986

     

    For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here:

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g

     

    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link:

    https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519

    We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.

     

    We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

    Chapters

    (00:00:00) - Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery
    (00:02:57) - Tom's Bottom Line
    (00:04:36) - Tom's Closet:
    (00:10:44) - Letting It Be
    (00:16:16) - How To Cope With A Codependent Partner
    (00:17:34) - A message from Joe in AA
    (00:20:56) - In the Elevator With Rumi
  • Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery

    The Five Points of Balance, Part Two

    16/06/2026 | 31 min
    Thom’s Nutshell:

    Ignoring our own dark potential only makes it stronger. Avoid washing dishes and there are not only more of them, they are also harder to clean. The difference between a reasonable and unreasonable expectation.

    From Allen: You can want from the best in you, or from the worst in you. You can want from what is healthy and solid, or what is empty and covetous. Wanting from neediness is common. Wanting from your solid, flexible self takes personal development. It takes growing up.

    From Thom: if any of you are afraid you’ve taken on your parents’ characteristics, relax. You have.

    The 5 Points of Balance:

    Staying clear about our values and worth in the face of criticism (not letting others edit your sense of self).

    Calming our anxiety and comforting our emotional bruises or trauma.

    Grounded responding and not overreacting or under reacting when there is tension or anxiety.

    Confronting ourselves for our own integrity and able to meaningfully endure discomfort for our growth and development.

    Unhooking self, others and reality from unreasonable expectations.

    Our music is provided by the great southern artist Jefferson Ross. Learn more about Jefferson at jeffersonross.com

    Visit our website:

    www.emotionalsobriety.info

    Follow us on social media:

    Instagram: thomrutledge2

    Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs

    Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here:

    https://rebelliondogspublishing.com 

     

    Friendly Circle Berlin workshops: https://friendlycircleberlin.org/events

     

    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/

     

    Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below): 

    https://zoom.us/j/330149513

    Password: 375986

     

    For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here:

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g

     

    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link:

    https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519

    We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.

     

    We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

    Chapters

    (00:00:00) - Emotional Sobriety
    (00:08:44) - How to Unhook the Hook From Your Relationship
    (00:17:02) - How to Stop Ignoring Your Own Dark Potential
    (00:20:55) - Your Sexual Attraction in Therapy
    (00:24:44) - Countertransference in the Glass Household
    (00:26:55) - Procrastination and Recovery
    (00:31:08) - How Complicated Is Writing a Letter?
  • Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery

    The Five Points of Balance, Part One

    05/06/2026 | 30 min
    Thom’s Nutshell:

    “The promise of perfection is a red herring. Don't be distracted from your pursuit of learning and improving.”

    Patrick celebrates eight years of sobriety and the gang discusses the importance of honoring recovery milestones.

    The 5 Points of Balance:

    Staying clear about our values and worth in the face of criticism (not letting others edit your sense of self).

    Calming our anxiety and comforting our emotional bruises or trauma.

    Grounded responding and not overreacting or under reacting when there is tension or anxiety.

    Confronting ourselves for our own integrity and able to meaningfully endure discomfort for our growth and development.

    Unhooking self, others and reality from unreasonable expectations.

    Our music is provided by the great southern artist Jefferson Ross. Learn more about Jefferson at jeffersonross.com

    Visit our website:

    www.emotionalsobriety.info

    Follow us on social media:

    Instagram: thomrutledge2

    Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs

    Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here:

    https://rebelliondogspublishing.com 

     

    Friendly Circle Berlin workshops: https://friendlycircleberlin.org/events

     

    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/

     

    Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below): 

    https://zoom.us/j/330149513

    Password: 375986

     

    For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here:

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g

     

    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link:

    https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519

    We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.

     

    We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

    Chapters

    (00:00:00) - Emotional Sobriety
    (00:04:10) - Joe Sobriety on His Eight Years of Recovery
    (00:07:21) - Applying the Principle of Differentiation to Emotional Sobriety
    (00:14:27) - The Differentiation in Personal Life
    (00:16:16) - 5 Points of Balance: How to Calm Your Anxiety
    (00:20:51) - Emotional Sobriety: Being More Present
    (00:25:22) - Tom on His Wife's Fight
  • Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery

    It’s Not About Just Waking Up, It’s About Growing Up

    24/05/2026 | 29 min
    Thom’s Nutshell:

    “Recipe for peace of mind:

    KNOW what you believe.

    KNOW what is important.

    KNOW what is within your control.

    LIVE congruently with what you believe.”

    Thom and Patrick discuss “the upside of addiction” (as a means of climbing out of it), emotional sobriety and relationship struggles, using during therapy, and approaching addiction as a binary choice between life and death.

    Our music is provided by the great southern artist Jefferson Ross. Learn more about Jefferson at jeffersonross.com

    Visit our website:

    www.emotionalsobriety.info

    Follow us on social media:

    Instagram: thomrutledge2

    Joe C. Twitter: @Rebellion_Dogs

    Learn more about Joe C., Secular AA and Rebellion Dogs here:

    https://rebelliondogspublishing.com 

     

    Friendly Circle Berlin workshops: https://friendlycircleberlin.org/events

     

    Allen’s book, 12 Essential Insights for Emotional Sobriety: https://www.amazon.com/12-Essential-Insights-Emotional-Sobriety/dp/1955415129/

     

    Join Allen & Thom at our Thursday night, 7pm PST Zoom meeting on Emotional Sobriety and the Steps (login information below): 

    https://zoom.us/j/330149513

    Password: 375986

     

    For our ongoing workshop video series on Emotional Sobriety and the 12 Steps, visit our YouTube channel here:

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHEM2-kqLkfp3I4c0jy-X-g

     

    Also, please join our “Emotional Sobriety and Recovery” FB Group at the following link:

    https://www.facebook.com/groups/120450976662519

    We’d love to stay in touch in between meetings.

     

    We appreciate feedback! Contact Patrick, our producer, at pndirective4@gmail.com for any questions or comments.

    Chapters

    (00:00:00) - Emotional Sobriety: Don't Get Married
    (00:03:40) - A Simple Recipe for More Happiness in Your Relationship
    (00:08:50) - The Importance of the Recovery Decision
    (00:12:34) - Patrick on Avoiding Problems
    (00:16:52) - Joe's Reflections on Alcoholism
    (00:24:02) - On the Motivation of Recovery People
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Acerca de Emotional Sobriety: The Next Step in Recovery
Bill Wilson, co-founder of Alcoholic's Anonymous, wrote in 1952, "If we examine every disturbance we have, great or small, we will find at the root some unhealthy dependence and its consequent demand." Wilson suggested that if we could identify and continually surrender these unrealistic and unrecognizable demands, that we may then be able to accomplish what he imagined to be recovery's next frontier - something he called emotional sobriety.   Flash forward 70 years, and join psychotherapists and best-selling authors Thom Rutledge and Dr. Allen Berger, who have taken up the mantle of exploring Bill Wilson's new frontier. Welcome to Emotional Sobriety.
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