When you’re anxiously attached, it’s easy to fixate on red flags and warning signs — scanning for danger in the early stages of dating. But if you’re always looking for what’s wrong, you might miss the important signs that you’re with someone who’s actually safe, caring, and aligned with you.In this episode, we shift the focus to green flags — the encouraging behaviours and feelings that can help you recognise when a connection has potential. You’ll learn why these signs matter, how they can soothe an anxious system, and how to pay attention to the way you feel in someone’s presence.We’ll explore:Why paying attention to how you feel around someone can be more telling than analysing their every moveThe importance of being remembered and feeling genuinely seenSigns of sincerity, effort, and sustained interest (and how they differ from love-bombing)The role of humour, playfulness, and ease in creating a healthy connectionIf you’re ready to reframe your approach to dating and start recognising when something is right for you, this episode will help you spot the cues that matter most.Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
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#208: Anxious Attachment & the Fear of Infidelity
Fear of infidelity can be one of the most overwhelming and destabilising experiences for someone with anxious attachment. Even when there’s no evidence a partner is being unfaithful, the possibility alone can trigger deep anxiety, hypervigilance, and constant worry.In this episode, we explore why anxiously attached people often fear cheating so much, even in the absence of proof. We’ll look at the core wounds and nervous system patterns that fuel this fear, the role of past relationship and childhood experiences, and how certain dynamics—especially with avoidant partners—can make these fears even more intense.We’ll also unpack the ways fear of cheating can show up in a relationship, the problems with trying to “prevent” it through control or monitoring, and practical steps to move towards a more secure, trusting dynamic.If this is something you’ve struggled with, this conversation will help you understand what’s happening beneath the surface and give you tools to respond in a way that’s calmer, clearer, and more grounded.You’ll learn:The connection between anxious attachment and fear of infidelityHow past betrayal or early life experiences can amplify the fearWhy anxious-avoidant relationships can trigger cheating anxietyHow hypervigilance and reassurance-seeking can harm trustTools for building self-trust and relationship securityHighlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
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#207: Why You Feel Secure When You’re Single (But Anxious When You Start Dating)
If you’ve ever felt calm and confident when you’re single, only to find yourself spiralling into anxiety the moment you start dating, there’s a good reason for it.In this episode, I share why this shift happens — and why it’s completely normal if you have an anxious attachment style. Attachment patterns are relational, which means they tend to lie dormant when we’re on our own. But as soon as we have something (or someone) at stake, we feel more vulnerable. The more we care, the more our protective strategies kick in — sometimes in big, overwhelming ways.This episode is a reassuring reminder that there’s nothing “wrong” with you for feeling this way — it’s simply your nervous system doing its job in trying to keep you safe when things start to feel risky. Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
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#206: How Understanding Your Nervous System Can Make You A Better Partner & Parent with Alyssa Blask Campbell
Understanding your nervous system is one of the most powerful tools you have for creating secure, connected relationships. But too often we approach it as a one-size-fits-all formula, rather than honouring the unique way our individual nervous systems work.In this episode, I’m joined by parenting expert and author Alyssa Blask Campbell to explore how tuning into your nervous system can make you a better partner and parent. Alyssa shares insights from her work on emotional development in children and explains why knowing your own system is just as important for the adults in the room.We talk about:Why nervous system awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligenceHow your unique nervous system traits shape your relationships and parentingPractical ways to move from reactivity to grounded presenceHow understanding your system allows you to show up with more compassion, patience, and connectionIf you’ve ever felt like the standard advice on regulation doesn’t quite work for you, this conversation will give you permission to explore what does — so you can build stronger, more attuned relationships at home and beyond.Connect with AlyssaInstagram: @seed.and.sewPurchase Alyssa's books hereTake the free quiz on your unique nervous system hereHighlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
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#205: How to Process a Sudden Break-Up (AKA the "Avoidant Discard")
When a relationship ends without warning, it’s common to feel blindsided, confused, and deeply hurt. This is often labelled the “avoidant discard” — but while that term might feel validating in the moment, it can also keep you stuck in a disempowering story.In this episode, we’ll talk about how to process a sudden ending in a way that honours your pain without leaving you tethered to it. We’ll explore:Why shock and lack of closure can intensify heartbreakThe difference between feeling discarded and being discardedHow villain/victim narratives can hold you back from real healingThe impact of online echo chambers on your recoveryPractical steps to reclaim your agency and move forwardThis isn’t about minimising what you’ve been through. It’s about finding a more grounded, self-responsible way to engage with what happened — so you can process it fully, integrate the lessons, and step into your next chapter with clarity and self-respect.Highlighted Links Free Break-Up Training: The 3 Shifts That Help Anxiously Attached People Heal After a Break-up Free Training: How to Heal Anxious Attachment and (Finally) Feel Secure in Life & Love Additional Resources Download the FREE Anxious Attachment Starter Kit here Join my email list 💌 Explore my library of free guides, classes & meditations Visit my website
Join relationship coach Stephanie Rigg in On Attachment, where she delves deep into all things attachment theory, love, relationships & intimacy - sharing her wisdom and experience to help you start making real changes in your life & relationships.
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