Bad Movies Rule!

The mailbag is stacked this week. A Beaverton care package delivers Oregon saltwater taffy (pickle pieces quarantined) plus a full Macho Man Randy Savage rap CD that disses Hogan. The movie haul includes a bloody In a Violent Nature collector’s set, The Burning, Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon, brutal WWII John Wick-style action, and the complete Leprechaun collection just in time for the new series.

BJ from Six Flags Great America sends FrightFest passes and a personal invite. Bobcat from Fargo drops a sled-dog Alaska story, a signed Billy Zane Phantom photo, a Teen Wolf Funko, Battlefield Earth on VHS, Chuck Norris in Good Guys Wear Black, Kevin Sorbo as Call the Conqueror, David Carradine in Dino Croc, and snacks that include chicken-and-waffle Oreos and garlic pickle popcorn.

Voicemails bring DJ’s Homer City street-view roast, Bradley’s Cyborg/Spy Hard/Waterworld lessons (night guns, flip-flop awards, Bullet Face, Chisum earworms), and Rob’s Neighbors/Doctor Detroit deep cut with Belushi, Aykroyd, and Fear on SNL. Emails settle the Friday the 13th hammock question, pitch a Dirt Bike Kid react, force a Fifth Element vs. Starship Troopers vs. Waterworld survival pick, and force the crew to read the actual “Big Bad Wolf” Teen Wolf lyrics out loud.

Plus the usual Packers-Bears fallout.

Physical mail, voicemails, and emails all open. P.O. Box 383, Burlington, WI 53105 or ThisShowIsTrash@gmail.com or 262-757-8567 if you want in next time.
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Warwick Davis in the role that somehow launched an eight-movie franchise. Jennifer Aniston in her first big movie. And Dana joins the show for the very first time to help us figure out how a movie this dumb got made.

We dig into the clover rules, the inconsistent powers, the flashlight beatdowns, and whether the leprechaun was ever actually the villain or just a small guy who wanted his gold back. Spoiler: opinions are split, and nobody is fully ready for how not-scary this thing is.

Full uncut version available on Patreon.

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Mail: Bad Movies Rule, PO Box 383, Burlington, WI 53105

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BMR Pregame: Leprechaun (1993). The Dead Starfish lace up against a little guy in a box, and nobody on the panel has a clean memory of how this actually goes.

From the trailer we try to figure out why a Dick Tracy extra is mailing a leprechaun, why Jennifer Aniston’s feet are Quentin Tarantino’s favorite shot, and why nobody in this house can just leave. Predictions cover the shipping theory, the car that will not start, the body count, and who walks out. Ryan is chasing another dead-even split. Somebody else is calling a blowout the other way.

Friday, October 16: Leprechaun. Dave and Brian from Sam Movie Jam join Mattila and the crew.

Bad Movies Rule! is a weekly roast of the movies you were not supposed to love. New episodes Fridays at 7 PM CST.
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The boxes are jammed and the snacks have their own storage unit. Daniel More sent Cheerwine and a whole snack bunker from North Carolina, Ryan Morenci loaded us up with pork rinds and cookies, and Combat Wiener Dog mailed Gary Busey keychains plus a stack of stickers that include a Die Hard duck and a Sean Connery loser quote. Movies in the pile: Guns Akimbo, TerrorVision, The Video Dead, Wing Commander, and a Stephen King triple of the Tim Curry It, the Steven Weber Shining, and Salem's Lot.

Then the mail turns on us. Steven Serna assigns every host a BMR movie that matches their persona. Joseph Paces fantasy-drafts a real Terror Squad (Chuck Connors, Steve James, Billy Drago, and a few more). Eric Valov demands a new nickname because he will not share Rubber Lover. Craig Soto, listening since 2021, writes in with a life update that we are absolutely taking credit for. Greg from New Jersey reports back from an AC/DC show and Hell's Bells. HR resigns after the counter hit five. Mr. Anonymous defends Final Destination 5 and 7. Timothy Caldwell puts Monster Squad back on the October list and calls out the Terror Squad vote. Matt calls from Seville with a Great Outdoors credits Easter egg. Chris calls from South Africa after committing the sin of listening to the competition. Bill closes it by singing the Teen Wolf basketball song straight through.

Email thisshowistrash@gmail.com, call or leave a voicemail at (262) 757-8567, or send physical mail to Bad Movies Rule, P.O. Box 383, Burlington, WI 53105.

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Friday the 13th Part 3 finally gets the BMR treatment, and the Human Movie Database is back in the room to help survive it. Ryan Farrell returns after four months away, the same crew from Part 2 is assembled, and Jason is now a ripped pro wrestler in a hockey mask that only exists because a lighting test went sideways.

Steve Miner (or Stefan, depending who you ask) shoots the whole thing in 3D, so laundry poles, yo-yos, and the slowest harpoon in horror history are aimed straight at your face. The disco credits never charted, except in gay nightclubs. The movie knocked E.T. out of the number-one spot. Harold is eating donuts off the shelf and getting murdered on the toilet. A biker named Loco attacks a rope. Somebody has hammock sex. Somebody else dies mid-handstand. And Chris delivers a backstory monologue so stiff it got studied in academia.

We cover the accidental birth of the mask, the barn Jason was just trying to nap in, why Part 2 suddenly looks like Cannes, and whether anyone in this cast can say a line like a human being. Awards get handed out. The final verdict does not get spoiled here.

Support Us: patreon.com/badmoviesrule

Email Us: ThisShowIsTrash@gmail.com

Voicemail: 262-757-8567

Mail: Bad Movies Rule, PO Box 383, Burlington, WI 53105

Gear Up: Grab tees at teepublic.com/user/bad-movies-rule
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